One of the greatest pleasures in life is to lessen one’s burden. That feeling when you climb to 10th floor and you sit on the staircase, that peace that you get when after a punishment you get to put your hand down, that breath that you catch after you cry, that fleeting moment when your heart feels light. It feels light when it doesn't have any baggage. When the heart is carefree and it is in full agreement with the situations going on outside, when there’s nothing that is stopping it from telling what it wishes to- yes that one feeling of being aware of your own self, your own being. But it isn’t this simple, isn't this easy(at least not for me) to tell someone what exactly you feel, especially if it’s something that makes you look weak, or any less stronger than what you want to portray.
I don’t know if it happens to others or not but when I feel bad about something, something which is hurting me, which is almost suffocating me inside and I know if I let this thing out and tell him/her it would hurt him or maybe result into something bad some failure, maybe I am a coward or maybe insecure and weak, but this is it, the final fact. But there has to be a way through which one can express his/her feelings some just tell, some paint, some believe in actions, some let tears flow, some get rebellious , and well some just write. I don’t even know why exactly am I writing this and making you read, or maybe I know. I am letting my heart out and right now at this very moment when I type, with every letter, with every word, every sentence I feel good and I feel I am not alone. I don’t wish to cry all the time neither do I wish to be angry on someone.
Sometimes I just feel alone and lonely and maybe scared that people might not understand what I feel and so I don’t tell them. But I am a human being and probably a sensitive one, more sensitive than I show , and I too wish to lessen the burden of my thoughts; no matter if they are crazy or mature or intelligent, to lessen my burden of emotions; no matter if they negative or positive or maybe just neutral, to lessen the burden of my heart; no matter if its pain or happiness, but I just wish to lessen my burden and maybe that’s the reason why words and paper are my best friends.
Ones who stand by me when I am alone, ones who have witnessed me crying, ones who have taken me to a place where I always wanted to be, ones who allow me to be just me. And now with this last line I feel light and there’s a smile on my face which doesn't come even if I am with my friends , a smile which doesn't come even when my bf says that he loves me, not even when my dad gives me a surprise or my mom cooks my favorite dish. This is a smile that comes when I am just ME; plain, honest, weak, tired, angry, rebellious, strong, sensitive, snobbish whatever I am this paper accepts me the way I am it doesn't judge me, its unbiased and it’s like an ocean which opens its arms to everything and still is silent.
I don’t know if it happens to others or not but when I feel bad about something, something which is hurting me, which is almost suffocating me inside and I know if I let this thing out and tell him/her it would hurt him or maybe result into something bad some failure, maybe I am a coward or maybe insecure and weak, but this is it, the final fact. But there has to be a way through which one can express his/her feelings some just tell, some paint, some believe in actions, some let tears flow, some get rebellious , and well some just write. I don’t even know why exactly am I writing this and making you read, or maybe I know. I am letting my heart out and right now at this very moment when I type, with every letter, with every word, every sentence I feel good and I feel I am not alone. I don’t wish to cry all the time neither do I wish to be angry on someone.
Sometimes I just feel alone and lonely and maybe scared that people might not understand what I feel and so I don’t tell them. But I am a human being and probably a sensitive one, more sensitive than I show , and I too wish to lessen the burden of my thoughts; no matter if they are crazy or mature or intelligent, to lessen my burden of emotions; no matter if they negative or positive or maybe just neutral, to lessen the burden of my heart; no matter if its pain or happiness, but I just wish to lessen my burden and maybe that’s the reason why words and paper are my best friends.
Ones who stand by me when I am alone, ones who have witnessed me crying, ones who have taken me to a place where I always wanted to be, ones who allow me to be just me. And now with this last line I feel light and there’s a smile on my face which doesn't come even if I am with my friends , a smile which doesn't come even when my bf says that he loves me, not even when my dad gives me a surprise or my mom cooks my favorite dish. This is a smile that comes when I am just ME; plain, honest, weak, tired, angry, rebellious, strong, sensitive, snobbish whatever I am this paper accepts me the way I am it doesn't judge me, its unbiased and it’s like an ocean which opens its arms to everything and still is silent.
When I started reading this post... I thought it would end up being something else...As i continued reading it... i still didn't guess...After i finished the post...it hit me then. U write really well.. It takes a genuine effort to write something which comes straight out of your heart...and write about YOURSELF!
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